Tag: Journaling

The Art of Joywriting

When we write, many things can happen. Often (and this is the beauty of writing) we end up somewhere entirely different than we thought we would. We start writing a story; we get a poem. We begin a journal entry about our annoying neighbour; we end up getting an insight about our childhood. Seriously, anything can happen on the page. It’s part of the fun.

Yet so often there is this… pull in our writing, a current moving just below the surface, drawing us towards a focus on the tough stuff. I have found this to be true personally and in my research and teaching practice. I hasten to add that there is absolutely nothing wrong with this—just as long as it is serving us. Sometimes the page is the only place we have to put tough stuff, in which case it is essential. Nevertheless, I am a lifelong advocate for one simple truth: the page is also a place for joy. And, for many reasons, joy on the page doesn’t often happen by accident.

In my experience, we must invite joy along when it comes to writing.

Reflective writing, for me, is a tonic. It is one of the greatest tools for self-development we have at our easy disposal. Yet the thing about reflection is that it is sometimes tricky; it can be heavy. Plus, it’s a learned skill. At different times of our lives, and in different areas of our lives, we may find it easier or more difficult to reflect.

We can also get blocked when we write reflectively. We may find we ‘don’t know what to say’ or that what we do say comes out wooden; it doesn’t feel true.

Enter a new, fun writing tool that’s both guided by our life-affirming emotions and easy: joywriting.

I’ve conjured this addition to the Positive Journal toolkit to celebrate all the ways in which writing doesn’t have to be particularly thoughtful or reflective, or even make any sense at all, to be a nourishing practice.

I’ve also coined this term to incorporate two traditions within writing for wellbeing: freewriting and ecstatic writing (a quick Google will tell you all you need to know about either). Joywriting takes the best bits of both of these writing traditions and combines them in a new way of meeting ourselves on the page that stays true to the art and science of what I call Positive Journal® writing.

Try it:

Spend 10 minutes today writing purely for joy, without attention to grammar, spelling, productivity, or any particular project. What happens?

This is a writing revolution, friends.

M x

Delve: Writing to Access Your Inner Resources (Freebie!)

Writing to access your inner resources

If you’ve lost touch with you in recent months (or years), you are NOT alone. So much of the frenzy of living in this world takes us away from who we are.

My latest course Delve may be just the antidote. Full of gentle guided journaling exercises, videos, worksheets and additional writing prompts – it is the opportunity to cocoon with me as you begin writing your way into a new season of self.

Free Worksheet & Clip!

I wanted to offer a teeny-tiny taster of what’s on offer, so download a sample (printable) worksheet here – it’s on the subject of the Borrowed Beliefs we often allow to hold us back – and watch the clip below for a teaser from one of the video sessions.

Find out more about Delve here – and sign up! You can start this course any time and it is completely self-study. I’d love to see you in the Online Classroom.

M x

How Do I Decide What Is Right For Me? (3 Quick Journal Exercises to Try)

In pursuit of magic | How do I decide what is write for me

The stories we tell about ourselves are not often all that helpful. One story that we can all get tragically stuck in is the ‘not for me/for me’ dichotomy. Let me illustrate:

Example A

You see someone leaving a relationship and making a new start alone. You say, ‘I’m not built to be alone; the single life is not for me / the familiarity of coupledom is for me.’

Or, maybe:

Example B

You see someone releasing a creative project, or living a creative life. You say, ‘I’m not creative; creative projects are not for me / practical things are for me’.

Of course, these are all perfectly fine things to decide about oneself (and we are all the final experts on our own selves) IF (and it’s a big if) they are true. 

Problems arise when these scripts about who we are cease to work for us. Or if, tragically, we begin to see that they never worked at all.

Issues lurk if the foundation of the ‘not for me’ thoughts is low self-worth and a lack of self-belief and if the ‘for me’ scripts are simply borne out of habit or social pressure.

We can abandon ourselves when we stick with unhelpful, inaccurate scripts out of misguided beliefs or fear. We also make it nigh on impossible to make the right kinds of decisions for our lives – decisions that may not be the easiest or the most glamorous or the quickest to achieve, but that will be true for us. 

If you find you are often asking yourself the question How Do I Decide What Is Right For Me…

Try these three simple exercises in your journal to help you come to more aligned decisions.

  1. Write a list of things you may have consciously or unconsciously been saying are not for you. Keep an open mind – these aren’t ideas you have to give up, but it will be interesting to get the lay of the land.
  2. Next, write a list beside it of things that you have been consciously or unconsciously believing are for you.
  3. Finally, write a ‘what if’ list. Pick a few of the items from lists one and two (e.g. ‘City living is not for me, marriage is for me, being a writer is not for me, travelling is for me’) and flip each self-concept on its head. Write these as questions and then right a short response. For example:
What if marriage *is not* for me?

I’ve always held up marriage as my ultimate relationship goal, but if I put that down for a moment I can see that a relationship is so much more than a legal document or big ceremony. I see that I’d rather have fulfilling and nourishing encounters with others, where we both feel free as well as held, and that maybe marriage does not have to be a part of that.


What if a creative career *is* for me?

If being creative was for me I might have to arrange my life very differently – and that is scary but also exhilarating. I might have to prioritise different things and accept I might not earn as much. I might have to risk some embarrassment in admitting this to friends and family – but they also might surprise me by being supportive of my dreams (they love me, after all). I think I’d wake up each morning feeling full of possibility. I’ve always thought a creative career is a wacky goal, but maybe it’s much wackier to live life in half measure.

This isn’t to say you have to give up any of your self-concepts if you don’t want to. You may find that some of them are very robust and worthwhile; the point is simply to investigate a little deeper.

Deciding what is right for you is often simply a case of removing the word ‘right’ from the sentence:

What do you believe is for you? What do you believe is not for you?

Are these beliefs true? Are there truer beliefs available to you? What would life look like if you aligned with those truer, perhaps scarier, but also more exhilarating beliefs? 

Start there.

M x